Matinee: Eternal Sunsine Of The Spotless Mind

In the spring of 2004 after decades of research and development, scientists finally came up with the cure for insomnia. After collaboration with a group of film makers the cure was distributed under the name, Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind. This is a film that I love to hate, I take great pleasure in the fact that when people ask me if I’ve ever seen it, I reply with a smug little grin on my face and say “Oh, of course! It’s FUCKING DIABOLICAL!”

The awfulness of this film is completely unparalleled . This self-indulgent, pretentious, toilet of a movie is not just dull, it brings dull to a whole new level. It isn’t just one aspect of this film that spoils it, it took every little detail and ingredient involved to make such a terrible film, the characters, the direction, everything. Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet are two-dimensional schizophrenic frames that we care very little about that play out a fragmented storyline that is about as interesting and inspiring as partly digested food.

What baffles me most about Eternal Sunshine is why are so many people are obsessed about it? I really don’t get the attraction, is it because Michel Gondry’s manipulative directing style is so avant-garde it makes art students convulse in ecstasy? Just because he’s French doesn’t make him Jean-Luc fucking Goddard! Is it because Charlie Kaufman’s screenplay is unbelievably original and touches the very fabric of your soul? Just because you’ve read a little Nietzsche and listen to The Beatles, it doesn’t make you an intellectual genius. Eternal Sunshine is a film for fruit cider drinkers, who roll their own cigarettes, who like the smell of library books, listen to Coldplay, idolise Andy Warhol, cut their own hair, drink herbal tea and believe they are much older than they really are.

This film’s assumption that is somewhat important and that it strikes a chord, is just a fabrication of its own pretentious nature. Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind is irritating, boring and it’s a complete travesty that a huge amount of people hold this film so dearly, because it helped them during a hard period in their life, because its a beautiful and poignant look at real life. To these many,  I say, get a grip and get some taste. I really do wish that Lacuna Inc. did exist, then I would be able to hire them to erase any memory I have of this film and then I would’ve of spent that 103 minutes watching paint dry and grass grow.

Image Courtesy of uimages.org

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